Roots Before Branches

Once you hit a certain age, which varies from one person to another, you’ll need to sit down with your thoughts frequently. Some life-changing events may lead you to this habit. Some of you may do so because you feel disgusted or annoyed with what happens around your personal circle or life at general.

The truth about life is that no matter how many times you hear wise words from seniors, you can’t truly believe them until you experience them on your own. Funnily enough, you will fall into the same problems, over and over again until you can’t rely on yourself anymore.

I have been a Muslim for my entire life. Being a Muslim means fully submissive to Allah swt, heart and soul. Performing five prayers every day, fasting during Ramadan month and giving alms don’t guarantee that you truly believe in His good plans for you. At least, that happens to me. I need to trip over a million times until I realize my ego and pride have got in the way.

The best news is when you encounter highly difficult trials and tribulations, that’s when He is about to purify you. That marks the moment when you know Him better and move to Him closer.

In my case, I cling to Alqur’an. I read the Book although most of the times, I misinterpret it. I keep coming to it although during devastating heartbrokenness, for instance, I didn’t find an easy way out.

Indeed, reading the Book with sound and genuine heart won’t bring you any solutions or ending your problems right away. But this is where the work of holding of the Book starts coming to fruition.

Alqur’an cleanses your lens for viewing life. Bit by bit, it helps you loosening worldly burdens that felt so heavy that they dragged your feet moving forward in life. The Book invites you leaving small roads that blocked your way leading your turning to Him. And my favourite is the book makes you coming to the roots of everything. Problems and solutions.

The much better news is that the Book strengthens your faith to Him and in turn, He makes you feel confident to wither against all storms.

In my own terms, this marks the moment when you recheck then repair all things that went wrong before welcoming much bigger challenges ahead. The moment is hard to come by. It requires you to contemplate, going back-and-forth and take rest most of the time.

You will then realize how the roots boil down to most fundamental principles that you frequently heard when you were a small kid. Iman, gratitude, taqwa, ikhtiar, tawakkal, ikhlas and sabr. Clinging to each and all of them is super tough but now you know those are the foods for making the roots growing solid and beneficial for others.

By the same foods, the roots will become branches, leaves and fruits that assist you as a truly Muslim according to the Qur’an and the sunah of the Prophet Muhammad saw (peace be upon him).

The good roots will lead you doing positive deeds and in reverse, the weak one will yield negative ones. Greed, jealousy, ego become roots of bad deeds that needless to speak here, how many sub-actions that come out of each.

You probably knew back then and now they become serious stuff after you experience on your own or know from your friends or relatives. At this point, as you make peace with your past, you may struggle to be mindful and present. Time and time again, you work on coming back to the roots of all, both good and bad things.

That may make your daily life is a bit overwhelming but worth of living at the same time. Even that comes back to the principle of mizan, the scale or balance, another lifetime idea from Allah swt. Masya Allah.

Putting on New Lens for My Second Literary Journey

I may haven’t shared in this modest blog that I planned to no longer read any fictions, including classics, that have been so special in my heart. Last year’s devastating heartbrokenness caused me to abandon any reading-for-pleasure thingy that I thought would pain me even further.

I mostly read books or articles about my religion, Islam, and started learning a bit of Arabic language. The last fiction that I read was “The Invisible Man” by H.G Wells that I didn’t review because I don’t quite like the book.

I enjoyed reading books about Islam, to be honest. During some months of total focus on the book genre, I realized I took classic books too much. I need help to stay positive and upbeat about life. Alas, most of the classics that I admire are stories about longingness, realistic romance, poverty, women rights, social values, idealism, materialism and other heavy stuff.

After reading that kind of books for around 10 years, eventually, there came the time when I was forced to review how my reading had affected my soul and my mind so far. And again, frankly speaking, I couldn’t help feeling sorrowful, pessimistic and unenthusiastic about my personal life and the world. I know that I shouldn’t act that way. That no matter how “close” the classics are to real live and people, they are still the works of imagination and prone to subjectivity. The books manifest their author’s opinions, past experiences and critics.

I admit that I was too much absorbed in the books that let them taking hold of my views about life in general. The heartbrokenness somehow refreshes my thought to finally coming back to read fictions, and of course, classic books, again. Do you know what?

At first, I felt so afraid of reembracing Victorian Literature for the dry wound would bleed again. And poor me! There were moments when I felt I wanted to really leave reading fictions for good. I wanted to ignore the book type because I said to myself the book genre was no good for my life.

During such time, I read printed books, as well. I even thought about dedicating my whole life for reading non-fiction. I resumed reading “Homo Deus” by Yuval Noah Harari. But I dislike the book. Not because I don’t yet accustom for reading non-fiction but the book isn’t well-organized. Too much information in such an overly crowded structure. I don’t know if I want to finish reading it or not.

And then there comes this COVID-19 outbreak. It has been almost two weeks that I have been working from home. Since the stay-at-home campaign was launched early March 2020, I thought of coming to read fictions. I missed being glued in very decent novels by Thomas Hardy or George Eliot. I missed getting lost in beautiful, artsy writing styles of Victorian writers. And yes, I missed imagining how peaceful and sociable life back then. And ah! the dress, the gown.. How I adore lace, pastel colours and a long skirt that make female characters in the book genre so graceful and ladylike, LOL!

Our Mutual Friend by Charles Dickens

So, last Saturday, I affirmed myself to shop briefly. Of course, I went to Kinokuniya bookstore at Plaza Senayan shopping mall, here, in Jakarta. I couldn’t help myself grabbing a classic book to help to go through yet another week of the stay-at-home period.

I wanted to unwind from getting connected to the internet while couldn’t step outside my room that I rent. Sure enough, I can read abundant articles and stories from my smartphone or laptop but doing so can’t release my mind and put me at ease. Reading printed books can only do that.

I thought of buying one of Sherlock Holmes series. Mind you! After the break, I have decided to limit reading books on fiction. I won’t read about romance anymore and all things that look gloomy and depressing. I couldn’t think of laying my choice any better than to read books about mystery, detective thingy and fantasy, much like Gulliver’s Travels.

And the bookstore offers so many versions of Sherlock Holmes. To my delight, it was easy to choose the Sherlock Holmes options, depending on my budget, LOL! But then, I am not really into Sherlock Holmes, by the way.

I couldn’t resist the temptation of glimpsing into other books, which of course, by famous Victorian writers. So, my eyes caught Dombey and Son by Charles Dickens. I haven’t heard the title. I intended to buy the book after I read the cover text which says the book tells about greed.

Greed, hmm.. Why did the theme suddenly pop up in my head during the coronavirus time? No topics can’t fit today’s pandemic better than this one. When I was looking at the title, my eyes moved to the book next to it.

Voila! It was Our Mutual Friend! Oh my God! I was looking for the book for years until I forgot it. I smiled, then grinned then relieved. I couldn’t find any better companion than this title. I didn’t want to grab it right away for I wanted to greet my friend long enough before officially embarking the second literary journey.

“Oh, you! So happy to see you!” I said to myself at that time as if the book could speak!

I brought it to the store’s cashier section and now, I am on page 200 something. The book is also about greed on money which really suits my search. No need to worry about coming to bleakness because I have Alqur’an as my wise reminder.

My daily reading routine runs like this: at the morning, I will read Alqur’an or listen to its interpretation by ustadz Nouman Ali Khan. After that, I read Our Mutual Friend. Sometimes at night, I continue reading the novel or reading a book about the History of Islam.

Such a packed and fully-loaded reading stuff but I’m happy that I keep myself productive and occupied with positive things. I always, always remind myself to keep reading at balance. Make the activity stands equal between Islam and fiction.

For now, I’m glad to tell myself that I don’t have to leave fiction, especially classic reading, again. I come to it with a brand new perspective and genuine love as I always feel.

Test of Faith in the Time of COVID-19 Outbreak

Yesterday, I cried while I was making dua after performing Maghrib prayer. About two weeks after the outbreak of COVID-19 in Indonesia, I complained a bit to Allah swt. I felt the whole COVID-19 thingy took its climax on me. I couldn’t help feeling miserable after I watched news on television on rising COVID-19 victims in my country. By the time I’m writing this post, 686 Indonesians are suffering from COVID-19, 55 of the number die while 30 others are recovered.

Before the prayer, my sister who works at a state-run hospital in Semarang as a nurse, warned me. She urged me to stay indoors, reducing using cash for preventing any COVID-19 virus making its way to my body. She told me so after I had shared my plan of going to a convenience store nearby a room where I currently stay. I had to draw cash because I still need cash for buying ready-to-eat foods and snacks.

She insisted me to cook or use food delivery, to which I declined because the COVID-19 pandemic makes online transportation more expensive. On the other hand, the room will be too packed if I purchase all cooking utensils. Alas, I also don’t have a fridge to store and keep all veggies and meats fresh for days.

During our chat, my head was already overwhelmed with unfinished jobs by that time. You can imagine how negativity was surrounding my mind that all I could think of was complaining to Him.

In the first two weeks, it was easy for me from swinging from hopelessness to positivity. Every time the Indonesian government announced on latest COVID-19 victim number, I took seconds to bounce from misery to good spirit. But yesterday told the different story.

As days go by, more Indonesians are confirmed as suffering from the virus. Worse, I found more hoaxes were spread everywhere, from portal news, WhatsApp group chats to social media. It became common that I would discover some rumors in one or two particular groups then had them clarified, revised or nullified by other people in another chat group.

I really wanted to smash my smartphone at that moment. No kidding! What’s the use of #socialdistancing and #workfromhome if we can’t keep our mind positive by limiting news consumption? Aren’t we hurting our mental health if keep doing so?

Truth to be told, after the Maghrib and even Isya prayers, I didn’t feel peaceful at once. Quite strange. The triple negativity took hold my mind and soul thereby I couldn’t put myself at rest while praying.

But there was one thing, one thing that relieved me. I stopped complaining right away. I picked up my bag, went to the convenience store by using a public minivan. I forgot to wear a facial mask but I didn’t return home for getting one. I used my headscarf to cover my mouth almost for the entire quick shopping.
The Palmerah traditional market, which is only some meters from where I live, seemed quieter. Few sellers were opening their stalls, such as foods and fruits. Most of them shut theirs. Only few public minivans were passing the market, making the area a bit lonelier than usual.

Yet just some meters from the market, a lot of citizens flocked fresh veggies, spices and fruits that were put on the edge of the main road leading to an intersection to Kebayoran Lama and Rawa Belong.

I found nothing changed that night. I can’t blame them for keeping business as usual that eventually drew would-be buyers. Surviving in the COVID-19 pandemic is getting harder as people choose staying at homes. At the same time, I regretted most of them didn’t wear facial masks let alone kept distance.

The convenience store welcomed more visitors than usual. And more citizens gathered around the store with small traditional food and drink stalls remained open. It’s really hard to stop people from working. It’s like it’s either they’ll die from the virus or from starvation.

I bought necessary stuffs at the store. I was proud of myself that I didn’t activate the smartphone even for just one hour. As I completed the transaction, I stopped a public minivan which was empty. He was speeding with me as the sole passenger.

And here was the best lesson of all. During the super short homecoming trip, the peace started taking over my heart again. The wind of the night felt so refreshing, probably as pollution was less harmful and the sky was clearer with more citizens didn’t use their vehicles.

I was grateful to Allah swt that He still gives me halal provision from home as I was looking at the traders who had to keep working on the streets. I couldn’t believe how much difference it made for not opening the smartphone for one hour. The good mood and faith only needed that short of time to finally blossom in my heart.
Having good faith during this difficult and uncertain time is like holding on an invisible rope. It will only get real when we look at it, over and over again.

My Love Letter for Alqur’an

Dear Allah,

This is me, your curious student of this universe. I’m writing for you after postponing doing so for many weeks. I thought the letter would be the hardest thing to do despite the fact You knew what things that were inside my mind.

Much like Your book that invites me visiting it again and again, so will this love letter. I actually dropped some takeout from the Book in the previous posts. But I need to sum it all then add more hearts in this post. And I hope I will write yet another post about Your book in the future as the more I study the Qur’an, the more I realize Your extreme love for me. And I have to share Your love for friends, netizens and anyone who happen to come by to my website.

You know what, ya Rabb? I will proudly and humbly share this love letter on the internet. Despite countless grammar errors and rumblings here, I am not ashamed to tell the whole world how super lucky I am to have come thus far, to have cherished and lived by Your words every single day.

Moreover, I am not afraid to let people know about our intimate conversation because I know my love for Your Book will always, always be reciprocated. Because You are the ultimate source of love itself. It has always been me who rejects or dismisses Your affection.

Some say, hardship is the express route for receiving guidance. In my case, that speaks more. The latest hardship is Your way of preparing me to receive the greatest gift ever in my life; Alqur’an. More precisely, taking the Holy Book seriously with this thankful and low-profile state.

I won’t get tired to mention this name, ustadz Nouman Ali Khan, for helping me to come to this stage. Every time I listen to his tafseer on Albaqarah, my heart is softened, renewed and revived. I talk to myself: “Wohoho, this is it! This is what I want for my whole life. Something that drives my curiosity while at the same time, keeps straight on the right path.”

I particularly love Your book because it marks the ending and the beginning on my new chapter of life. You must know, ya Allah, that I am such an avid reader and writer. Masya Allah, you have blessed me with these incredible hobbies; reading and writing. The two have been my best buddies since I was a little girl.

Running to books and writing have been my solace. I don’t have to worry of losing friends because they will never leave me. I don’t feel old despite the fact that I grow weaker physically as days go by. Absorbing information, embracing knowledge, reflecting, contemplating and sharing have become my habit.

Somehow, I slowly made the pursuit of knowledge as one of the top goals in my life. Of course, the knowledge wasn’t about You or the Qur’an. I worshipped opinions or writings from intelligent authors. During the years of doing so, I read Your book. But that felt nothing. Worse, I didn’t think it was important for connecting myself with Your book with a down-to-earth attitude. I thought cleansing my heart was unnecessary. No wonder I considered Your book as mere knowledge. It didn’t attract me by heart.

Alhamdulillah that the greatest calamity in my life happened last year. At the beginning of 2019, I felt like the calamity couldn’t hit me any sooner or later. What was supposed to happen eventually did. It took me by surprise that as months went by, You taught me a precious lesson I couldn’t think of. The calamity was all my own fault. You permitted the emotional rollercoaster to have occurred to teach me one thing. You wanted me to get closer to You more than ever. Only then my relationship with Your book has got tighter.

It does take multiple, tiring phases to really build a solid and sound foundation with the Qur’an. But the pain and the confusion are so worth it. I am overjoyed every time I read your Book then get what lies behind every ayah. My heart leaps with enthusiasm. Sometimes, I cry every time I recall how loving You are by dragging me closer to the Holy Book.

I was a dark, pessimistic person. I was fighting with nostalgia and overthinking. Alhamdulillah, coming back to Your Book calms my heart. Better future and bright days always lie ahead. And nothing is as bad as I think of.

And You know that as I get closer to Your book, the harder the tests await me. Some of them have turned into realities. And you know what, ya Allah? I start thinking it doesn’t matter what will the results be. All I care is maintaining this sincerity and reliance upon You only. All I want to nourish is this imaan or faith upon Your help and good plan.

This religion, Islam, begins looking so beautiful for me. I have been a moslem for my entire life but I come to that conclusion just now. Well, at least, I proudly say that with this honest heart. The religion indeed teaches me to first and foremost believe in You, act according to Your words and leave all efforts entirely on Your hands.

Easier said than done but I have come closer to You by doing that. And really, it’s the journey that really matter. It’s the process that tastes so sweet and liberating. I finally sip the delicacy of imaan that Masya Allah sets me free bit by bit.

Ya Allah swt, I could spend hours to enlist wonderful things that have flourished inside my heart because of the Holy Book. But as You always teach us to put everything in balance, I thus end it now. Thanking you immensely for all of the blessings. Guide me to always keep my intention pure and grateful.

Your humble servant,

Eny Wulandari

A Eulogy of Adulthood

There’s always a teary moment whenever I have to come back to Jakarta after a brief or long stay at my hometown. It’s always hard to say goodbye to my parents, relatives and neighbours at home. Jakarta is my second home, indeed. But my actual home is with my beloved family in Karanganyar. No one could ever replace them in my heart.

One thing that rescues me from overly sad is reminding myself that I am a breadwinner of my family. Remembering that my parents can’t work anymore somehow prevents me from feeling overly mellow. When I was a teenager, I felt so low about myself because of lack of money. We were poor at that time that my mother had to borrow a big amount of money for financing my and my sister’s studies.

Up to now, our family has to work hard. There are always sudden, important matters that require, well, mostly, money. For instance, two months after being accepted as a full-time employee, my father was rushed to a hospital. He was suffering from a heart attack. Alhamdulillah, he is recovering. He is gradually returning to his routine, walking around some blocks around our house.

On the other hand, I have to cover his health check-up because our health insurance (BPJS) doesn’t cover the fee. Sure enough, I don’t complaint about this. On the contrary, I am grateful that I have to work hard for this (not for the disease, of course). I’m thankful that the limited financial constraint forces me to spend my money wisely.

As I grow older, I feel being a responsible person is such a blessing. With tons of responsibilities in front of my eyes, like it or not, I have to leave mundane tasks or prolong my pleasant activities.

In a larger extent, (attempting) to be a responsible one is stripping away from unimportant thoughts, opinions, activities or desires. Being a responsible person is part of becoming an adult. As you reach this stage, sometimes you may get scared. I still remember, when I was in my 20s, working for my family was such a burden. I often said to myself at that time, I felt like I was carrying a whole world upon my shoulders. Of course, that was too much, LOL!

But as I have been accustomed to the responsibility, I am thankful because I am forced to be a real adult. And lately, I realize that’s how Allah swt drags me closer to Him.

I got this inspiration from reading phenomenon in social media, especially Instagram. I didn’t know why that at least in some Western countries, I spotted on #adulting or #adulthood. Later, some writers touched the issues on their writings. I’m a bit confused because adulthood is something that should actually be embraced. Yes, I know, that’s easier said than done. And frankly speaking, sometimes it’s hard to be an adult, especially when I am now an English teacher.

Working as an educator reminds me so much about the role parents must act out. You have to be extra patient to share information for your students. You have to study twice or three times harder before teaching them for a subject that you already master. Whenever I feel low, I think about the pact that I make to myself that I’m doing my best for carrying out this responsibility.

Remembering my actual age, which is 36, often successfully slaps on my face whenever I’m about to force my opinions to others. It would be too shallow to think I would be officially smart whenever my stance overpowers another’s.

Lastly, being an adult means I have to keep logic and emotion at a balance. This is quite hard for a sensitive and overthinker person as I am. Sometimes, feeling surpasses logic but as I realize how dreadful that is, I work on making the two elements equal.

Becoming an adult is daunting, sometimes, but it will feel stupid to behave like a kid when you realize you can be one.

Taklukkan Tiga Salah Persepsi Ini untuk Keahlian Membaca yang Optimal

Cukup langka rasanya mendengar ada calon murid atau siswa les Bahasa Inggris yang menyengaja belajar Bahasa Inggris khusus untuk keahlian Membaca. Tentunya ini kursus di luar ruangan kelas ya. Mayoritas orang ingin mengasah kemampuan berbahasa Inggris untuk keahlian Berbicara sebagai keahlian yang paling sering digunakan.

Padahal menguasai keahlian Membaca sangat penting bagi fokus keahlian yang ingin kalian pertajam. Faktanya, empat keahlian dalam Bahasa Inggris; Membaca, Menulis, Mendengar dan Berbicara, tidak bisa dipisahkan satu per satu.

Bagi kalian yang memang tidak suka membaca, menekuni latihan untuk keahlian Membaca dalam Bahasa Inggris memang membutuhkan perjuangan ekstra. Tapi bukan berarti melatih untuk keahlian ini sesuatu hal yang mustahil, terutama bila dibarengi dengan usaha untuk membuang jauh tiga salah persepsi di bawah ini:

  1. Membaca itu Kegiatan yang Pasif

Ya, dalam hal gerak fisik. Tak dipungkiri membaca dalam kondisi duduk memang paling ideal untuk memperoleh fokus yang lama dan tepat. Tetapi membaca di sisi lainnya merupakan jenis latihan yang sangat baik untuk otak kita. Serupa berolahraga membuat badan kita sehat, membaca memberi makan otak kita.

Apalagi yang kita baca adalah materi dalam Bahasa Inggris. Ini seperti memberi makanan bermutu dua kali lipat ke otak kita. Baik fiksi atau pun non fiksi, membaca membawa otak kita, bahkan emosi kita, bepergian dari suatu poin ke poin lainnya. Kita menyelami otak penulis A, penulis B dan penulis lainnya.

Otak kita menjadi terisi penuh. Dengan menikmati bacaan dalam Bahasa Inggris, otak kita mencerna banyak hal. Yang pasti, otak kita menyerap banyak informasi baru. Kosakata kita bertambah. Otak kita turut mempelajari struktur tulisan yang benar. Tata bahasa, hal teknis dalam Bahasa Inggris ikut masuk ke dalam otak sehingga lama kelamaan akan menempel hingga secara tidak langsung mengoreksi kesalahan teknis yang selama ini masih membuat kita bingung.

Bayangkan betapa aktif otak kita dalam membaca sekadar satu atau dua jam saja dengan fokus yang penuh. Tak heran bila setelah membaca, otak kita menjadi lelah dan membutuhkan istirahat.

  1. Materi Bacaan Harus Berat dan Panjang

Tidak harus mengasah kemampuan Membaca mesti melalui bacaan berita terhangat atau membahas isu politik dan ekonomi saja. Tak melulu mengasah keahlian ini lewat buku teks tebal atau novel klasik buatan Charles Dickens atau George Eliot.

Sesuaikan level Membaca kalian dengan bacaan yang akan kalian lahap. Tidak perlu terburu-buru dalam menaikkan level. Carilah bacaan yang pas dan beragam lalu catat kosakata baru dan buatlah kalimat sendiri dari kosakata baru tersebut.

Tips lainnya yakni buatlahh daftar bacaan yang berbeda-beda. Jika minggu ini kalian sudah membaca untuk kategori Ekonomi, minggu depan carilah materi bacaan untuk Kuliner.

Saya merekomendasikan mencari bacaan yang ringan dan menyenangkan bagi pelajar level pemula. Topik seperti makanan, musik dan film, dapat kalian pilih untuk menumbuhkan rasa suka dan penasaran yang semoga berlanjut pada level yang lebih rumit lagi.

  1. Membaca itu Monoton

Jika ada yang beranggapan keahlian Membaca itu hal yang monoton untuk dilakukan, itu kurang tepat. Sebagaimana yang saya singgung bahwa keempat keahlian dalam Bahasa Inggris saling berkaitan, kalian bisa memodifikasi keahlian Membaca dengan tiga keahlian lainnya.

Sebagai contoh, kalian bisa mencoba audiobook. Di sini, kalian bisa mengasah keahlian Mendengarkan dan Membaca sekaligus. Di YouTube, ada banyak audiobook yang membacakan novel klasik. Maksimalkan tips ini dengan membuka buku yang dibuat versi audionya. Kalian bisa mempelajari cara pengucapan yang tepat sembari meningkatkan kemampuan Membaca.

Cara lainnya adalah membaca dengan nyaring. Zaman dulu, pembacaan di depan orang banyak hal yang lumrah dilakukan. Selain membuat bacaan “hidup”, cara kuno ini dapat mengasah teknik pengucapan dan interaksi dengan yang mendengarnya. Ekspresi yang spontan tercipta saat membaca dapat membuat yang membaca dan pendengarnya semakin senang membaca.

Nah coba deh, sesekali membaca sambil mengucapkannya. Jika perlu, bacakan dengan teknik dramatisasi. Selain lebih dramatis, tips terakhir ini dapat membuat kalian menjadi lebih percaya diri dalam berbicara di depan umum, loh.

Nggak percaya? Coba saja!

 

Making Sense of the World

I don’t think there is a deadlier combination than becoming a writer and enjoying a deeper spiritual connection with God. Add to that, you’re an overthinker by nature. You feel no happier than being in that state despite side effects that may arise. You enjoy feeling so heavy all day long. You find your reading habit grows bigger than ever. You find your mind is opened wider than before. You can set aside selfishness and take up what others bring into your life.

As your ego starts receding, your chest becomes light. It’s easier for external knowledge, people behaviour and thoughts come into your life. You feel fine with all of them because you put yourself as a seeker of truth. You are comfortable and confident to search for truth after your relationship with God is renewed.

The more you’re closer to Allah swt, the more you love pursuing knowledge. Furthermore, you start filtering which knowledge is necessary. You even act on the knowledge. As your glasses get cleaner, you’ll see every phenomenon, all things viral in the world, super diverse opinions as something common.

Somewhat your mind initiates connecting between dots. All blurry lines begin vanishing. They gradually fall into black and white groups. A large group of grey areas are diminished. You accept the fact that your ego stirred the blurred lines. Now that the grey lines are reduced, you can tame your ego. You’re fine that there are grey lines that can’t be changed.

When you refresh your intention for writing for the sake of serving others, you’ll find you no longer pursue readers’ likes, views, comments or shares. You focus on the writing to satisfy Him. You realize that your writing talent and passion must be excelled to serve His better.

As you purify your writing intention, somehow He helps you cleansing your view of the world. Most importantly, He helps you sticking on your view which actually stems from Alqur’an. You won’t be afraid to speak the truth although most people, including your friends, will oppose your opinions. You’ll find your old views were wrong. You have to revise to pay it back.

The world starts making sense and when it does, you’ll feel you’re alive. You know that most of the world’s problems derive from just a few diseases as Allah swt stated in His book. Greed and arrogance are amongst most highlighted diseases in Alqur’an that have born into uncountable, modern bad habits. Not a few of them that lead to self-destruction, even self-suicidal.

You feel no shame anymore sharing your scars because you hope others can find them beneficial. You don’t view yourself as someone’s noble. You only wish others can learn from your story, much like you reap benefits from the stories from another person.

You are inclined to decency. Something’s inside you feeling refreshed every time you hear or do something good. It just flows naturally. You have no ideas why and how. At the same time, your heart hurt whenever you see something bad. It just doesn’t feel right.

Lastly, you understand how sin can lead to tremendous outcome. And sinful acts mostly come from greed and arrogance. You know people remain on the state because they don’t want to let go of their ego. They don’t want to feel defeated. And you know worst scenario can lead to disasters.

You know that someone can be very cunning. They can justify their wrongdoings, part of which are influenced by satan. Sadly, not all of them know about this. They think what they do are decent despite the fact they only hurt themselves.

A person can enslave himself or herself to drugs because they can’t cope with certain issues. They don’t want to admit they’re too coward to face the truth. They run to drugs over and over again.Else, they don’t know their ruh needs to be purified. The void within themselves require nourishment that come from nowhere else but their Creator.

A country invades another country’s for reasons the former creates on its own. A company pollutes a city with smart yet materialistic marketing promotion. An official taints his or her image through social media or YouTube video. Even human beings can still earn money from positive causes, like climate change or a religious-based gathering.

As you find root problem for accidents or problems, the world starts making sense to you. You’re getting confident as a human being. The “this and that” options that occur every waking hour doesn’t bother you anymore. Because you come to the most basic problems along with the solutions. Because you know you’re living for a purpose. And lastly, because you know you’re coming back to Him eventually. So why bother yourself seeking people’ approvals on top of all?